torn once again

the guardians of my mind are at war again.

i don't know if i really want school to start already. of course, it would be another year. of mixed feelings and experiences all at once. but if truth be told, half of me wants to go, and half is begging for a REAL vacation.

i suck.

there's one thing i hate about the start of this schoolyear. my mom's leaving again in a few days and she'll be gone for a few weeks. darned business trips. and she won't be here on father's day... awww... i feel for my dad. :'(

most of what transpired yesterday were very disturbing. i hate that my cousin got really screwed and there were more family problems now that she'll have to deal with, i hate that my friends are having weird arguments again, and i hate that a lot of people i know are sooo sad now because of certain things. i don't know... am i bringing back the old jaimie too concerned of the miniscule details, or am i just stuck in a phase of oversensitivity now? i can never get this question answered.

my best friend among the family friends i have called me two days ago. i really missed her, and it feels so bad that we still won't get to see each other. after all, laguna is sooo not a ten-minute car ride from my house. but still. it sucks that her family's issues keep her from meeting with the rest of us who miss her. i hope she really gets to stay with us next year.

for some reason, i had more fun today with my parents than i normally do. and my mom's and my mutual quest for an iPod failed. oh well. better luck next time to us.Ü anyways, we were left to roam the mall together while my dad paid bills. okay, we were bad. hahaÜ well, we had so much fun cruising the aisles of watson's and consulting each other on better paraphernalia.Ü aside from the usual things i get, i got white rain's lavender and vanilla shampoo. i know talking about what shampoo i bought seems stupid, but i love it, because its greatness lies on the obvious fact that it combined two of my ultimate uberloved scents--doi, lavender and vanilla-- and i only saw it today. yipee!Ü

going back to the school related mush, i still don't know when we start classes. people say it's on the 16th, but it still doesn't convince me. the others say, 14, but i don't know about that either. oh well. at least i'm still going there on tuesday to meet my dear sis. either way, i get to know when i really should come to class.Ü

i see that keeping myself logged on will make my head ache more, so, goodbye happy world and i will see you soon. happy independence day.Ü